Expanding your network…
Being the parent of a child with autism makes you a little more aware of eye contact in conversation. I’m noticing some interesting patterns at NECC that say a lot about how I socialize. First, there are times when it has become painful for me to make and maintain eye contact. That has to be a sign that I’m overwhelmed by the sheer number of folks I’m seeing and meeting. While this year’s conference has a smaller turnout, 18,000, that’s still a lot of people to plop down in one place.
Sometimes when I’m talking to folks, I find my eyes wandering to scan the crowd and I’ve seen others do this as well. We are either trying to find someone we were waiting for in the sea of people, or checking for faces we know in person already. Sometimes we are checking for someone we have only known online up to this point and have been dying to meet IRL. This is that one golden chance to meet others we haven’t seen face to face and we don’t want to miss that opportunity.
Those of us who have already been to conferences, even local ones, have a circle of people we know and hang out with. They are our base camp in this sea of humanity. It is easy to stay in a tunnel here. If you are completely unfamiliar with teaching conventions, and never go online for PD and professional social networking (and there still are folks like that even at a place like NECC), you will stay in your bubble of local district buddies, an “accidental” tourist at the convention.
If you are too wrapped up in your “network” you already have, you will miss conversations with the person in front of you, or next to you as you go down your must meet check list. You will be in your own bubble that includes only folks you KNOW are like minded, but may miss a conversation you should have had with the person in your district back home, or in a session at NECC who is from the other side of the country.
My favorite meetings are the ones that are impossible to plan, but easy to undermine. You miss them when you only talk to the folks you already know. Those are the connections based on nothing more than propinquity. You sit next to someone at a session, and one of you strikes up a conversation. You are invited to tag along to a dinner, and are seated by someone from the other end of the country that you’ve never met before. Someone strikes up a conversation as you wait for a shuttle bus. You could learn a lot, or, you could miss that metaphorical bus, as you avoid eye contact and conversation.
Photo credit: My eye on Flickr
11 Comments
Alice Mercer
Monday, 6th July 2009 at 10:18 pm
I hear I was WRONG about the turnout being lower, but it was about 18,000 with the exhibitors included.
Errin
Monday, 6th July 2009 at 11:06 pm
After reading your post, I have to share this! At a recent conference, I ran into Betty, a lady I knew a little from graduate coursework. Betty invited me to join her for breakfast and introduced me to the two other women at the table. Polite small talk ensued. I felt a bit out of my comfort zone but I like to meet new people I was enjoying myself too.
The interesting part was that, sitting beside me at the table, was a lady named Claire. After a few minutes, Betty pointed out that I follow Claire’s blog, at which point I realized I was sitting beside someone that I knew of and had ‘met’, but only virtually through blogging! I had been reading and commenting on Claire’s blog for almost a year. That morning, I sat right next to her and never would have realized who she was had it not been for the fact that Betty made the connection!
This is one of my favourite coincidences, and probably one of my most unique ‘meetings’ I’ve experienced so far!
Reflections on NECC 2009 Day One | Alice Mercer's PD Blog
Tuesday, 7th July 2009 at 12:04 am
[...] Have gone up at: http://inpractice.edublogs.org. Enjoy! Also a post on the “social” scene and how to make the most of it is at: http://www.isteconnects.org/2009/07/06/expanding-your-network/ [...]
Nancy Pratt
Tuesday, 7th July 2009 at 1:27 am
Hi Alice,
I Loved your post here and even though was not at NECC THIS year, your words ring true to me…
Last year, I was there and had the chance meetings of several people now in my PLN and it happened just as you explained.. But we had to risk reaching out and opening up and out. We both (all) had to be open to rejection and except for one incident that I had with someone that was pretty surprising and disappointing, every single person I met was generous and kind. We spoke the same language, and in most cases, I felt as though we were starting our conversations in the middle of the sentence…:) You know what I mean?
Most everyone I met …I have kept in some sort of contact with, mostly on twitter, blogs, eluminate and email, but it is so wonderful to know that there are those folks out there …connections. Folks who care about the same things as I do in education and technology.
I just appreciate all of the support and learning I have received over the past two years as a result of these two past NECC conferences, and will continue to try to nurture my PLN in the same way I have felt nurtured! :) Thanks, Alice, for being one of my wonderful PLN people! I enjoyed meeting you last year, and have totally enjoyed your webinars and our network…:)
Nancy
Gayle Cole
Tuesday, 7th July 2009 at 11:26 am
Hi, Alice.
I, too, am a parent of a child with autism. I wish I’d met you while at NECC. So many things about the conference made me think of my son, and autism would have been one of many things I would like to discuss with you if I’d met you in the see of 18,000. I had a harder time connecting with others at NECC this year than I did last year, perhaps because I brought my family on the trip and I felt a tiny bit divided while at the conference, or perhaps it was just chance didn’t offer me those connections it did in San Antonio.
I am trying to develop my PLN and am making baby steps… I am glad I found this post of yours, even if I didn’t get to meet you f2f.
Gayle
coleg@cee-school.org
Alice Mercer
Tuesday, 7th July 2009 at 11:39 am
@Errin: EXACTLY what I was talking about! Glad you made that connection.
@Nancy: Wish you could have been there. I sometimes worry that when we don’t expand who we talk to, we are just speaking the same language and not getting outside our box (I do that myself sometimes).
@Gayle Cole: I almost came with family (although they would have left before NECC), but $ did not permit. I really missed my family on Sunday when I was at the Smithsonian Air and Space, so I documented the heck out of it, and told them to look at pics. Not the same, I know. Folks who commuted in, had some of the same issues. Those after meetups seemed to really “gel” things.
I do wish we had met. One of my favorite convos was with an educator who worked with a teacher using IWBs in her autism class and I shared my son working with one in his classroom. Follow me on twitter, or let me know if you have a blog/facebook/Classroom 2.0 page I can follow.
Theresa Reagan
Tuesday, 7th July 2009 at 1:00 pm
Alice,
Your post has applications beyond large national conference settings. Your perceptive and honest reflections about the need to connect with those outside your comfort zone could be extended to staff gatherings, parent related events and, for students, cross-grade experiences.
I plan to share this post with the staff and post in on my school blog. Thank you for taking the time to write an article about the courage to maintain eye contact and focus on meeting and learning about someone new!
Gayle Cole
Tuesday, 7th July 2009 at 1:42 pm
Alice,
The workshop you said was one of your favorites is one I missed; earlier today though I emailed the presenter to ask for more information. Now that I see you enjoyed it, I am glad I did!
I haven’t kept up enough with blogging about educational technology, but I plan to improve that this year.
I do blog about parenting a special needs child, though. Email me if you would like the url. My little corner of the blogosphere has some wonderfully supportive community members, and a good sense of humor, too!
Best,
Gayle
Alice Mercer
Tuesday, 7th July 2009 at 1:59 pm
@Theresa Thank you. I’m happy that this struck a chord.
@Gayle, it wasn’t a session, although I’ve heard of some great one, it was just a dinner conversation. I’d love to join, I’d suggest you drop the URL here because there are other parent/educators like ourselves, AND it’s a resource for teachers to point parents to? I’ve started to follow autism folks on twitter, and I will retweet stuff to educators because they need resources too!
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